Welcome to the Wacky World of Sensory Fashion
by MusicalLuna1
Summary: Everyone knows Shawn can't do anything the normal way.


**Feeling You Up: An Almost Platonic Story of a Day of Shopping**

Blame sc for this. I wanted to write something tactile, had no ideas and this was aaaaaaaaaallll sc's idea. Idn't it great?! XDDDDDDDDDD

Enjoys!

* * *

Shawn eyed his reflection in the mirror, running a hand up and down his stomach, taking in the texture of the charcoal gray, emo Elmo t-shirt he had on. It was smooth and thin, soft. Just a little bit clingy too, but it was so light it didn't bother him. He was definitely getting it.

Moving back into the dressing room, he stripped off the t-shirt and tossed it on top of the pile of "to buy" clothing. He had always enjoyed shopping, but mixing it up always made it even more fun, and today he was shopping based on touch. If an article of clothing looked good, but didn't _feel_ good, today, it was out.

He was pulling the next candidate over his head when he heard a familiar voice mumbling to herself outside. Grinning, he tugged the long-sleeved shirt into place and flung the door open.

Juliet stood at a nearby rack, her back to him not four feet away. Stepping up behind her and thrusting out his arm he said, "Do me a favor. Feel this."

Jerking away, Juliet cried, "Oh my gosh, you perv—"

Catching a glimpse of her attacker when he caught hold of her arm, her mouth dropped open and she hissed, "Shawn! What the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?"

"Hey, I'm just looking for a second opinion," he said innocently.

"You asked me to _feel_ you, Shawn," she retorted.

"No, what I asked you was to feel _this_." He held out his arm again and gestured to the sleeve that covered it. "I'm shopping tactilely today. I want your opinion on this shirt."

"Shopping…tactilely?" Juliet said dubiously. "Uh huh."

"No, seriously. You have to touch it, Jules. Come on. Help a friend out," he said, waggling his arm.

Juliet bit back a smile and rolled her eyes. "Fine. But this is really creepy, Shawn." He simply grinned in response and held out his arm again. With an exasperated twirl of her eyes, Juliet laid a hand on his arm, feeling the shirt.

"Oh, come on," Shawn complained. "You're not getting the full experience. _Feel_ it Jules."

She shot him a dirty look, but reluctantly ran her hand a little ways up his arm, feeling the fabric, smooth and buttery beneath her fingers. As she focused on the sensations, she forgot exactly what it was she was touching and her hand continued up his arm, feeling the contours of the muscles in his arm, softened by the quality of the cloth and the faint warmth coming from underneath it.

"See how soft it is?" Shawn said, breaking her out of her reverie. "Wouldn't you want to be hugged by someone wearing this?"

She blushed and snatched her hand back, nodding absently. "Yes, it's very nice, Shawn."

His eyes crinkled in a smile and her cheeks colored even further. Shawn always made her feel transparent, and it unnerved her. "Come on," he said, and, brain still trying to catch up with her, Juliet allowed him to pull her away. A few moments later and her arms were full of shirts, Shawn shepherding her into a dressing room.

"Shawn, this is the men's dressing room," she protested as he pushed her into a stall.

"Oh, come on Jules. The place is practically empty, no one's going to notice," he said and pulled the door shut.

Unable to muster up anymore arguments, Juliet did as told and began trying on the first shirt that Shawn had thrust into her arms. The speed with which Shawn had gathered the shirts, and the fact that they were all the right size made her wonder if Shawn had been doing more than a little thinking about this opportunity as he shopped.

The first one she tried on was a silky material, liquidly soft and cool against her skin. She stepped outside the dressing room and was opening her mouth to call Shawn's name when the door to the adjacent dressing room swung open and he stepped out. Juliet bit her lip and tried not to stare.

Shawn grinned sheepishly. "Uhhh…this one's a little small I think," he said and Juliet snorted.

"You think?"

The baseball style, three-quarters sleeved shirt was obviously at least two sizes too small, practically vacuum-sealed to the psychic's upper body. Despite herself, she noted that his arms were practically ready to burst out of the narrow sleeves.

"How did you even manage to get that on?" she asked, laughter barely hiding within her voice.

"It actually went on pretty easy." He rubbed a hand over one shoulder. "It's pretty soft though. If I could breathe I could appreciate it better. How's yours?"

Juliet smirked and said, "Very nice. Silky."

"Well, now that we're both wearing nice feeling shirts, obviously we have to hug to test drive them," Shawn said with a nonchalant half-shrug and stepped forward, extending his arms as far as the tiny shirt would allow. Juliet had no argument for that, so she bit her lip and moved into the hug.

Shawn's arms wrapped around her, and it was impossible to ignore the fact that she could feel his muscles moving against her through the thinly stretched fabric, his arms strong and solid and warm. His hand settled lightly on her back, heating the silken material and she mimicked the motion, her teeth clutching her lip even tighter as she realized that she could feel the contours of the muscles in his back, the shirt like a second—slightly fuzzy—skin. He traced one hand gently up and down along her spine a few times and nodded his approval into her hair. She swallowed, nearly pushing away, but something held her back.

"This _is_ nice," he murmured. "It's so _sleek_."

She smiled. "Yeah. Yours is…tight."

Shawn snorted and released her. "We're going to have to work on your tactile reception and vocabulary. So what do you think? Yours worth buying?"

"I don't know," Juliet said, looking down at the fuchsia shirt. "The color's kind of pretty, I guess, and it feels nice but…it's _expensive_."

He smirked. "You forget this is tactile shopping, Jules. Tactile as in: you buy by feeling. And you like the feeling, right? I'll get it for you." When she looked ready to protest he held up a hand and said, "As an induction present. Just go with it, okay?"

Her head tipped to the side as she considered him, standing there in his tiny shirt and telling her something utterly ridiculous. She put her hands on her hips. She would probably regret asking this later but… "What _other_ kinds of shopping do you do, Shawn?"

He grinned and as he began trying to worm out of the shirt, explained. "I've gone auditory shopping before."

"Auditory shopping?"

"Yeah. I base—" He grunted and then whimpered, suddenly finding himself with his arms stuck over his head, the shirt only half off, and no more leverage to get it any further. "Jules!" he cried pathetically. "Help?"

She laughed and moved forward, grabbing hold of the hem of the shirt and tugging, hard. With both of them pulling, he finally came free of the shirt and stumbled backward, shaking his head. "Whoa. I can breathe again."

Juliet laughed again. "You were saying?"

Taking the shirt back, he ducked into the dressing room and called back, "I base my purchases off of the vocal reactions of the clerks. An 'ehhh' and I don't buy it, a 'hmmm' and I seriously consider it, and an 'ooooh' is an immediate buy. I mean, of course there are variations, like if someone passes out or something, but those are the basics."

"Oh my gosh. You are…so bizarre, Shawn Spencer," she said, shaking her head.

He poked his head back out of the dressing room, grinning. "Dude, Gus is an olfactory shopper as much as he is a visual shopper."

"_Olfactory?_ I don't even think I want to know how that's done."

Stepping outside with the armful of shirts he'd chosen, he smiled and said, "Oh it's a spectacle all right. Gus smells everything even before he picks it up. He's pretty good at making it casual—there's lots of wafting involved—but people still stare and give him a really wide berth when he's shopping. He gets in a zone though, doesn't really notice. He says that certain smells can't be washed out of clothes. I think he's nuts, but hey. Whatever. Every man to his own."

Juliet stared, and slowly shook her head. "The things I learn about you guys…"

Shawn grinned and spread his arms wide. "Welcome to the Wacky World of Sensory Shopping!"


End file.
